What Does Femininity Feel Like?

Hello Goddess!

If I were to ask you what does femininity feel like to you what would you say?

If I were to ask you how does femininity show up in your life what would you tell me?

There is a tribe in the Amazon that has inspired me, they call themselves the Achuar people.

The live their tribal lives honoring their feminine and masculine roles.

The feminine role is to create such as make babies, cook, and make a special drink that supplies them with carbohydrates and they are the builders.

The masculine role is to hunt, fish, be a warrior, bring home protein, cut down trees to make shelter, and be the required destroyers who keep the village alive.

Both roles, the feminine and the masculine, are essential.

HOWEVER, the Achuar women have one more role … they tell men when to STOP.

It is the women’s role to tell the men when there are enough trees for shelter and they say: ”You don’t need to cut down any more trees”

Women tell them when they’ve brought home enough fish and the village has enough to eat, they say: “Don’t kill any more fish they say”.

It is a beautiful reminder of collaboration rather than competition, of contribution rather than greed, of trusting the Universe always has our back.

This is what femininity looks like for me:

✿ It means becoming fully available to receive

✿ It means knowing the art of receiving

✿ It means connecting to my soul and letting my intuition guide me

✿ It means trusting in my intuition

✿ It means all my desires for beauty, luxury, relaxation, and self-care are a part of my power

✿ It means leaning into my “sexy woman” (makeup, hair, clothes) without guilt or feeling frivolous

✿ It means being strong and compassionate simultaneously

✿ It means empowering those around us

✿ It means knowing how and when to set boundaries (when to say STOP)

✿ It means knowing sensuality and beauty are part of my essence

✿ It means vowing for collaboration rather than competition

✿ It means choosing contribution rather than greed

I’d love to know what does it mean to you. Would you share in my Facebook group “Unleash Your Inner Power”?



My wish is to empower and inspire you to live with your masculine and feminine side in harmony and balance allowing you to expand and enjoy a fuller richer life.

Shine bright


Valerie Shakti Bottazzi

Love Coach & Healer

Seat belts on for the roller coaster ride!

My life’s journey has been an alchemical transformation bringing love out of pain and healing out of trauma


The underlying current has been a process of reclaiming my uniqueness, remembering who I am while incorporating an executive manager side with my shamanic healer skills.

My name is Valerie Shakti Bottazzi. I am a woman who has had the courage to leap into her soul’s calling blending the cultures within me (Argentine, Italian, American) as I discovered who I wanted to be. I am an honest deeply transparent woman, lover, mom of 2 teenage boys, heart centred entrepreneur, life coach, courageous, fearful and fearless, creative, colourful soul in a human body. All of these words describe me partially; they are a label for a small part of the complex being I am… just like you.

I believe we can ALL live a life of joy and purpose. That is why I chose to walk my talk by embracing my entrepreneurial side as a life & success coach for divine profesional women over 40 so they can overcome their limiting beliefs in order to believe in themselves and their power to succeed. The way I do this is with my coaching programs.

Change is the only constant


If there is one thing that characterizes my life is “the roller coaster ride”. As my mom to this day tells me how amazed she is at the many sudden twists and turns my life has taken.

As life evolves we all learn that change is a constant and that every single event in life has a teaching for us if we chose to open up to it. In Japan the videogram of crisis represents “danger” and “opportunity” and this notion immediately felt true to me when I discovered it. My fabric is made out of the multiple threads of my lessons learned.

I learned the hard way that being a hyper-achiever was a way to cover for my lack of self worth

Since I was a teenager I gave it my all to succeed at whatever endeavor I pursued. I thought I was being inspired by my soul and passion, but I was thoroughly mislead by my belief that I wasn’t worth it….except this belief was buried deep within my subconscious and manipulating my desires in a robotic manner unbeknownst to me. Without realizing its hidden power I set out into life to be the best at everything I did, getting straight “A”’s in education, winning at sports activities, but I always needing to reach for more since the gaping whole of my worthiness could never be fulfilled. Only true awareness would one day heal the wound of perceived unworthiness.

Integrating both sides of my being, feminine and masculine, was the result of an amazing inner healing no longer keeping myself divided in two

For most of my life I have felt inadequate, a fish out of water, a square peg in a round hole…. and I have felt divided in half. On any given day or time I would either embody my business savvy woman or my shaman spiritual part. I lived my life happily for many years in the corporate business world with my male side taking over as I lived in a lopsided way albeit bringing on success in the material world, which as in a daze fuelled me to keep going … for a while.

In and out of this journey I would take time to go into an “inner quest intensive” period, I took yoga retreats, participated in meditation camps or in shamanic rituals. As I immersed fully into my soulful side I experienced immense joy and magic, but coming back home was hard.

Keeping myself divided in two as I was coming out of these retreats and stepping back into my daily routine became harder and harder. Before leaving these retreats I would cry my guts out thinking of returning to daily life. My body was talking to me but I wasn’t listening much at the time. Having to keep my true nature hidden was killing my spirit and making me suffer. I would go onto my business trips and cry some more in my hotel room.

This suffering made me understand I had to do something about it and thus my deeper journey started.

Every person and every situation that are present in my life at a certain time are here because I have called upon them

The first powerful awareness that created an important shift of consciousness was when I understood that “every person and every situation that are present in my life at a certain time are here because I have called upon them”. Accepting this made me realize that the same way in which I called these manifestations (I didn’t use to give them this name), I could also change them. This was an empowering new way of looking at things even though at the time the responsibility of it seemed a bit overwhelming.

I also discovered so many people are living divided in the same way I was. I therefore changed the way I interacted with others, showing my inner truths even in normal business transactions. Most important I found out people welcomed my candid approach and the opportunity to contact this lighter side of being. I became happier to be alive and more in synch with the integration happening within me.

Doing was my drug

I have endured anxiety attacks when fear was so strong it ate at my solar plexus and ripped my heart as I stood over the precipice knowing the only solution was to let go completely and I was not able to at the time.

I have sought all types of strategies… mostly doing. Doing was my drug, I “knew” that if I kept moving and doing things I was “in control”…. Nothing farther from the truth. I meditated, I wrote in my journal, I walked in nature, I did yoga, I took courses, I read books, I loved and I TRIED to trust and then I did some more…but fear won for a very long time…. And in the end, nearing the turning point, fear was so subtle it masked itself in all kind of tricky feelings or thoughts. Sneaky little thing, the ego tried to trip me at every step of the way.

I bucked and resisted, and tried to let go, and did and didn’t. I was not able to comprehend in the depths of my being the difference between doing and being. Being. Simply being. No other thing needed. It scared me to the core! The solution is so easy yet not simple to implement. Letting go COMPLETELY of control and in total trust just BE.

This suffering made me understand I had to do something about it and thus my deeper journey started.

Things began to shift

I am a happy mom of 2 boys, now 16 and 19 and proud as I watch them become themselves. I made a difficult and wise decision 11 years ago when I divorced from their father, and when I was the sole breadwinner as a top executive in a multinational Corporation. The decision was to drop that lifestyle and be close to my sons, I chose to be THERE as they grew into becoming men of value.

At the time I was living in Italy having been born and raised in Argentina and having lived in California for 8 years I took the broker’s license courses and became a Realtor in Tuscany.

They were not easy years, hardship had many faces from lack of material means with the crash of the world economy, rough emotional roller coaster through disagreements with my ex, healing old wounds, and reaching for my inner truths. I have experienced depression through hopelessness, shame, abuse and overwhelm when no solution seemed possible from my perspective.

Taking a leap of faith was fundamental for my transformation

Taking a leap of faith is such a huge part of it. I didn’t know the HOW when I decided the WHAT but I knew that since this is the calling of my heart, the path would have been revealed at the right time, and sure enough it happened and it is still happening.

I started to learn what it means to take action with specific intent. I began to make specific changes and choose my words carefully with clarity regarding what I wanted the outcome to be, and true to my new reality, things began to shift, people that had a different belief systems left my life, synchronicities happened, and at the same time I continued to change and to perceive my own life differently.

My life as I knew it had to die so the new one could have room to grow

An urgent need to embark deeply into my soul’s journey coming out at the other end vulnerable, female, softer, stronger.

It changed everything, the way I look at life and therefore my dreams and goals. I couldn’t stay one more day living the life I had lead until that moment. I had a desperate need to be of service to help my soul sisters discover what has been revealed to me.

Having opened up to the truth of who I am, recognizing that I am spirit that seeks expression through my soul in my body I remember love, I remember that I am one with all of you, I remember we are one.

It is a journey into remembering who I am, who we are

Through pain I have learned that when I feel stuck, desperate and devastated, it is because I FORGET WHO I AM, in those moments I forget we are one and I feel “separate”. It is the “separation” that brings over the doomsday feelings.

I don’t live my life as in “a rosy every day is wonderful” way. I put myself on the line and I challenge my comfort zone and days like today are a bit harder.

It is a journey into remembering who I am, who we are.

It wasn’t always like this, on the contrary, I have lived in the illusion that we are separate, within the matrix of submission giving away my control to the outside world… to my parents, to my spouse, to my boss, to the banks, to whatever happened around me…Speak of limiting beliefs!

Looking at these beliefs, starting with the ones that made me suffer the most, has been a fascinating part of my journey and I learned that unfortunately I am not alone, most of our paths are similar in one way or the other.

Expect magic as the logical consequence of trusting life TOTALLY

Fast forward to the present moment.

A new awareness, a new level of consciousness, my boys no longer little guys but each a “manboy” in transformation, an amazing soulful life partner by my side, and my whole system telling me I couldn’t keep living a life that was not centered in my heart.

I now deliberately choose my empowering beliefs.  And here I stand, now at 53 years old, waking up every morning so serene, at ease, loving, trusting and joyful that I surprise myself.

I now understand what it means to live in the magic, to expect magic as the logical consequence of trusting life TOTALLY.

As I touch and live this space full of heart and purpose I now know MY WHY

It is about knowing my reason, knowing my why, knowing that I am living my purpose, that I am here through a lifetime of choices, whatever they might have been, without judging them good or bad….these choices have brought me here, to this date, with my joys and my pains. I can see clearly that every single thing that I have lived through has enriched my understanding of human nature.

My why is that I yearn to help my soulful brothers and sisters to be able to do the same, to walk their own journey and put forth their unique dreams and their unique gifts. I know that this life of grace and ease is available to each on of us. The answer is truthfully at the other side of fear.

As I touch and live this space full of heart and purpose I yearn for you, and you and you … to be able to share this joyful space with me.

My wish is for you to listen to your inner voice, to follow its lead and to create waves for other people to shine bright. I deeply believe in this, I believe we are here for a reason and that each of us is important and special.

I would be honored and would love to work with you so you can tap into your magnificence and overcome whatever is keeping you from flowing with all your might.

I believe in the powerful life force that manifests when we are in alignment with our heart and dreams. I feel it is my time to give back to the world through my set of skills and qualities. Life is an adventure worth living and sharing it is a must!             

Grab your complimentary “Breakthrough to Love” and get started today – Click here!

Valerie Bottazzi

Why is it so difficult to practice self-love


Hello there,

Today I was inspired to do a video about

“Why is it difficult to practice self-love?” 💜❤️and as a consequence

“Why is self-love so important? 🙌”

I hope you enjoy it!



Wanna have a good chat? 💙💎

Here is the link I mention in the video.

During our FREE “Breakthrough to Love” session we will explore what is keeping you from expressing your inner feminine essence and you will come away knowing the #1 thing you can do to start attracting your soul mate today.

BOOK A “BREAKTHROUGH TO LOVE” call with me now

Lots of love!
Shine bright! 👑💄😱🌟

Valerie Bottazzi

Love & Success Coach

The Healing Journey

The healing journey is a deep thorough 360-degree journey.

Healing emotional and physical pain implies going deep into our souls to the original trauma and revisiting from the safe place where we are now, embracing it, loving and letting go.

The healing journey is of the body, the mind and the soul. Because it is the only possible way. One cannot exist without the other. The are not the same but they are intertwined. They are not the same but they collaborate for good or bad.

The best part is that the healing journey is full of hope, love and aliveness and we always come out the other end renewed, more alive than ever, transformed.

I know.

I know because I have been there more than I care, deep through the throws of the darkest nights with body, mind and soul. I never EVER imagined what a fulfilling, deep, rich life was awaiting for me coming out from suffering. The transformation set me free and it will do the same for you, guaranteed.

I can help you find the resources within yourself. I can hold your hand while you dive deep searching for your own answers. Don’t doubt yourself and don’t doubt that you deserve better. You deserve joy, fulfilment and purpose.

Waking up depleted, not being able to sleep, feeling depression is at your door is not what life should be.

I let you in on a secret: listen well “No one will come with a magic wand to get you out of the mess you are in.”

Yes. I know I thought so too. But only you can do that. You and only you can get yourself from where you are. But the best part of the secret is that it is an empowering and rewarding journey.

Book a clarity call with me. I would love to be in your team. I know that if this message tugs at your heart I can help you. I guide you. I am or your savior. You are. I am your coach, coaching you to get the best out of you taking you to levels you didn’t even know you had within you.

Book a complimentary call with me now.

Love and light.

Shine bright!

Valerie Bottazzi

Life & Success Coach

“The soul always knows what it has to do to heal itself. The challenge is silencing the mind” [Caroline Myss]


How I stumbled into success



Joy is our divine right. Western society has taught us for the most part, that we must suffer, that through suffering we will “purify” our souls.

The level of awareness on Earth at this time allows us to realize that suffering is not the way to purify our souls but rather to SUFFER. Simply stated.

The way to purify our souls is to align our life with our soulful purpose.

The way to purify our souls is to live our lives as a beacon for ourselves first and foremost and thus shining bright lighting the way for those coming behind us.

The way to purify our souls is by tapping into the best version of ourselves and committing with our loved ones, family, and friends, to be there for them judgment-free to support each other in our journeys to become our BEST VERSIONS.

Living life this way makes life an adventure that is fun and joyful as we discover new horizons. As we live our lives in integrity letting go of beliefs that keep us suffering and playing small, we become amazed at the magic that life has in store for us.

Life becomes a series of apparently synchronistic magical events that makes us flow into a life of ease softly and lovingly. It seems like a “children’s story” but it isn’t. It is a new level of consciousness and awareness and lifestyle available for each and every one of us, here, now, in today’s day and age.

When you cry yourself to sleep you are forgetting that there is a better life available for you.

When you live with dis-ease is because most likely your body is telling you in the best way it can, that there is something that is hurting your soul.

When you suffer through your loving relationships remember that what makes you suffer most likely is a mirror of your deep wounded feeling being spoken back to you.

But mostly REMEMBER and REACH OUT for the life of joy, health, wealth and abundance that is a decision away on the other side from fear.

Ready to have a call with me to get clear on how to tap into this wonderful “bestest of best” version of yourself and receive an Activation Prayer so your life can start becoming the life you dream of?


Love and light.

Shine your light bright!

Valerie Bottazzi

Life Coach & Healer

“When what you value and dream about doesn’t match the life you are living, you have pain.” [Shannon L. Alder]

What perspective does to you

Funny what perspective does to you.

This morning I woke up and my heart was pouring love and gratitude. Literally. Not just saying it.

While I was still in that state of semi-vigil my mind and my higher-self had a look at the last “20-something” years of my life and mostly looked at the last 2.

A feeling of gratitude overcame me and I understood what a gift all the hardships I have been through the past years have been.

I am a spiritual woman with an inner journey that started during my teenage years, therefore I understand the concept of gratitude for hard times from a mental standpoint, but it is not always easy to shift the knowledge into experience, emotions, and feelings.

I have also revisited my past, my very past PAST, with the help of other coaches and healers and masters, with different tools and approaches such as psychotherapy, meditation, shamanic healing, Osho Prana Healing (energy chakra clearing), Aura-Soma (healing with colors), releasing of cellular memories, and more… I have come at it from every single angle I could gain perspective from.

Through this process I have gained more love for myself and for others, I have dropped judgment and I have learned empathy and compassion.

Excluding the last month where things have changed profoundly, I can clearly state that the last 2 years of my life have been on many levels, mostly the levels that pertain to my own personal power, THE HARDEST ONES.


Because having a loving soul-caring big-hearted grounded man by my side (yes all of that), that was holding the space for me to safely let go of control and dive even deeper, all shit came lose (pardon my French).

So I dove deep into the very depths of the darkest of nights of the soul… and gave it my all. As you have probably heard before, embracing the darkness in you and allowing it to come inside, you actually dissolve the darkness and allow light to come in. Yup, it is counterintuitive but it works this way.

The underlying key element in this alchemic process is TRUST in life, unshakeable faith in yourself and mostly in the fact that the universe, Source, God (you give it the name that works for you) has your back and wants the best for you. THIS IS THE KEY POINT.

The universe wants what is best for you, and while you are walking through your shadow side, and since you might not remember this and at times may not even believe this is the case, you throw a tantrum to the universe! [Smile] You know what I am talking about. You stamp your feet, and you yell, and you resist, and the more you do this the more you stay where you are! I love the ironic sense of humor of the universe. [Smile – Smile – Smile]

However, when you relentlessly keep at it, when you surf the waves of doubt, when you always, tenaciously come back to that space of trust while holding your vision, you eventually make it through to the other side.

I was telling you about this morning… As I was lying in bed I understood at a cellular level the priceless gift I have been given by walking in my “hardship” shoes.

As I now move forward into a shining future, manifesting more and more the vision of success I have for my heart-centered soulful coaching business, I realize the powerful empathy and understanding that I carry within me, beyond all my training, professional career, certifications and healing path.

I was there, I know what it means to visit the darkest pit, a few examples below:

*there were times when I only had cents to put  food on the table for my sons,
*there was that when I failed in the launch of what I had wrongly perceived was my dream holistic center,
*other moments I felt stuck on a plateau and nothing I was doing seemed to bring results,
* those years with the abusive husband father of my children
* I fell in the hole of the credit matrix
* Many more dark deep black times of depression

The fact that I got back up and accepted a new vision and dream as a co-creator and went after it, the hardships I went through, all of this and more, is POWERFUL, because when you tell me where you are in your own journey, I can embrace you and receive your shadow, holding the space for you to believe in yourself, knowing that magic is real and that what you think is real is, is in fact, the illusion you chose for your spiritual growth.

If I ask myself what was the most powerful element that helped me re-create a new reality for myself I can answer with two things:

  • the belief others had in me when I couldn’t see it encouraged me to remember who I am
  • hanging in there always remembering that after the darkest night comes the dawn.

I want to do this for you, hold the space for you, help you remember your power, who you are and believe in yourself.

The end of the year is a time of evaluation. It is human to look back at the “one-year-bucket” and think about what we did, what we didn’t, what was great, and what was not that great. And it is also a perfect time to set up new goals for the next “bucket” of 1 year.

How about you make the BEST OUT OF 2018 and you kick it off by giving yourself the gift you most likely give your loved ones? What do I mean? I mean putting yourself in the first place, investing in yourself and reaching for that life you know is available for you, a more fulfilling joyful life of ease and grace.

Book a clarity call with me now and let us make a plan together. Know where to start and transform your life.

Much love.
Shine bright!

Valerie Bottazzi
Soulful Business Coach

Every transition is easier if you believe in yourself and your talent. [Priyanka Chopra]

If you believe in yourself everything is possible.[Miley Cyrus]