7 “Anxiety Killer” Steps

Last week I had a difficult week in a way I hadn’t experienced before.
I was having a combination of physical exhaustion and difficulty to stay present in my life and my body. This created a series of events that I judged as negative and that created “a bit” of a downward spiral.

You know how big I am about co-creation, positive thinking and feeling, and how I strive to be in integrity by walking my own talk. As I realized I was “freaking out” was going into negative thinking I said to myself “enough, I know what to do about this”.

The process I went through has 7 basic steps that I am sharing with you so you can use them when you may need them. We are all human and we all may have moments when things seem less than rosy, don’t we?

Step #1 is to NOTICE what is going on.
​You DO know when you are heading into negativity, you may feel some anxiety, and your thoughts take you down into more of the same.  The simple act of “noticing” the thought shifts you immediately from “being in the situation” to “observing the situation” which leads to the next step.  And, guess what? You may journal about what comes up for you to gain further clarity.

Step #2 is to RECOGNIZE the FEELINGS
Now that you are aware of what is going on ask yourself “how am I feeling”? The answer is crucial for you because you will become VERY aware that you are not feeling particularly good. For me, the thoughts were of this type “I am anxious because I SHOULD be doing xyz and I am physically tired and can’t allow myself to rest” (have you ever felt this way! LOL).

Step #3: FORGIVE yourself for having these thoughts 
Forgive yourself for not being “perfect”, for being human, for being out of alignment. It happens to the best of us! Ask yourself “what is positive about this situation?”, “what can I learn from what has just happened or is happening”?

Use​ any techniques you know to clear your subtle bodies and help yourself by also clearing the space where you live. Do some smudging, light some incense and candles, or do it your own way. This will support your ability to pivot and take the following steps.

What you did in the prior steps was to “press the PAUSE button” and by doing so you created space to CHOOSE what you want to create. Now you can ask yourself “how can I do this differently”, “Is my thought real?”, “is this true”?  You will realize for sure how there is a better course of action and how your “internal dialogue” was not necessarily true or that you could adjust it and choose differently.

Use​ any techniques you know to clear your subtle bodies and help yourself by also clearing the space where you live. Do some smudging, light some incense and candles, or do it your own way. This will support your ability to pivot and take the following steps.

Always tap into your higher self or Divine Guidance. Ask to be supported and shown what is best for you and to fully integrate the learning. Meditate and/or journal about this too.

Always, always, always, remember to be grateful for every opportunity we have to grow, learn, expand and live a better happier more fulfilled life.



Valerie Shakti Bottazzi

Spiritual Life Coach

It Only Takes 3 Minutes

Lately, I have been rejoicing in the flow of manifestation. Yes. I said manifestation. I have known the term and I have been studying and aligning with the Law of Attraction for many years now. I have had the joy of seeing it at work in my life in many ways, and more and more these days, in absolutely clear and concrete ways.

In 2007 a friend of mine invited me to watch this “new awesome movie that just came out” called “The Secret”.  Yes, you ready correctly!!! It was 2007. Only 12 years ago. At the time the idea that we create our reality seemed a radical and new idea. Nowadays we’ve heard and read about it and you may come across it here and there continuously.

But there is a caveat to it.

You have probably heard the most well-known piece about the “Law of Attraction”: what you think, speak and act, you create and therefore it is important to watch your thoughts, words and deeds. 

However, in the above statement there is one missing link. The Universe, Creation, Source, responds to feelings and emotions, therefore, when you just think something it is not enough to manifest it. It takes FEELINGS to manifest something. It takes vibrating to the emotion of already having the one thing you desire. 

And how do you do that you may ask?

Doing exactly that. You’ve got to feel and emote. 

It takes just 3 minutes a day.

In the morning, when you are fresh right after your meditation, or your ritual, or your walk, or your yoga, or your… whatever you do to feel good, put your timer to 3 minutes, close your eyes, and visualize the very thing you desire to manifest. Visualize it and emote it. Observe yourself doing it, feel the smile come on your lips, allow the laughter to come out. 

This is powerful stuff. You may think 3 minutes is too little? Do it and you will learn that in our inner “quantum” time, 3 minutes is a lot! There is so much you can visualize and feel and emote in 3 minutes.

Do it consistently, every single dayand don’t give up until you are living the very thing you are visualizing. Trust me. It works.

Love and light,


Valerie Shakti Bottazzi

Life Coach & Healer

Share with me your experiences, questions or comments with the form below.

Love and light

PS: Share with me your experiences, questions or comments with the form below.

Love and light

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Is this you?

Have you noticed you have a tendency to put people on a pedestal?
Or have you ever done it? Maybe once? Maybe more than once?

For many years of my life I, put people on a pedestal. Not everyone of course. But I became aware of my tendency to “figuratively hold” bosses, teachers, mentors, and even men I liked, above me. I use the term pedestal, because, in my mind, these people were great, so much more than methey knew more than me, they were more perfect than me, they had more experience than me, they were so handsome, and so much more.

Since I thought so highly of them I strived to become more like then, and since I am such a good student (seriously!) I invariably would reach a point when in my own evolution I would notice that they would unbeknownst to them… “let me down”. 

Yes, they would suddenly come crashing down the pedestal and I would get all ruffled up and mad inside. I would have the most difficult conversations inside my mind until one after another I realized that:

a)    they never asked to be placed on a pedestal
b)   they didn’t think they were better, more intelligent, more of anything (for the most part!)
c)    this was my own doing and therefore my own “un-doing”

I have learned on my own skin the importance of holding myself up no matter who sits by my side or stands in front of me. I am worthy. Period. As are you.

That is why in the work I do I ensure you know that you and only you are your own teacher. I may be a facilitator, a guide, the one that opens some crucial doors for you but you and only you can do the work. I can help you shine the light on those parts of you in the shadow, we all have our shadow side.

I have learned that in order to continue with the unfolding of my life, living on purpose, I need someone ahead of me in my path, to help me see my blind spots… but here is the key point. Ahead of me doesn’t mean better than me, it only means that they are a few steps ahead in the same way I am a few steps ahead of the women I work with.

The shamans, teachers and coaches I have work with can help me see the way in which I get in my own way, they can help me identify the “obstacles” so to speak, but only I can remove them, only I have the key to the healing inside, the same way in which I can help you but YOU and only YOU can remove them … if you so desire. 

Love and light,


Valerie Shakti Bottazzi
Life Coach & Healer


“Darling, self-discovery isn’t always about the most convenient ways…”

Affirmations to start your day


Today I share a tool to support you as you harness the potential available to you as you walk your soulful path.

Anything we think, say or do will effect your life, therefore, it is important to nip the negative inner dialogue in the bud.

When you are going along the day or facing a challenge, what does your inner voice say? Does it encourage you with a “Heck yay, you can do it!” or does your internal critic kick in?

Whenever you find yourself within a negative loop of self-talk, the antidote is to interrupt the pattern and replace it with positive affirmations. Therefore, I want to give you a tool that you can practice every day so you can be ready to transform your inner dialogue to go from defeatist to constructive.

Know that YOU CAN control your thoughts, and that to break the habit of negative thinking you need to switch the channel in your brain to banish the negativity, and replace those thoughts with positive, valid words of wisdom.

Affirmations are positive statements that describe a desired situation or goal in the present tense as if the situation has already happened.

The way to use affirmations is to repeat them often as a way to reprogram your brain and motivate your mind to act according to the repeated words. This repetition tricks your subconscious mind to believe these statements and accept them as true, raising  your vibration and creating a positive field to attract congruent events and situations into your life.

I am sharing with you a shortlist of positive thoughts to get you started so that you can then add your own:

* I am a master at what I do
* I genuinely believe in myself
* I love and accept myself just the way I am
* I am grateful for ….. (this goes a long way, create as many as you wish!)
* I have peace and harmony in my life
* I am masterful at accomplishing whatever I set your mind to.

“I am” statements are super powerful. Create as many “I am …” with a positive adjective following the dots, as you can muster. Most of all HAVE FUN and enjoy loving yourself through positive statement affirmations.

Lots of love,
Shine bright!

Valerie Shakti Bottazzi
Life Coach & Healer


Momentum: Why is it important?


I used to hear my coaches tell me how I had to build momentum in my life and business and, to tell you the truth, at that time I couldn’t quite grasp what they meant.

Now I know that as we embark on our path to making our dreams come true we often find ourselves in resistance mode. This is because in order to say YES to our dreams we must do something different than what we have been doing…AND chances are that the way in which we lived our life before saying YES to this new version of ourselves that we are calling in, albeit lacking luster seems safer than the unknown that is ahead of us.

To step up and reach towards a better version of ourselves implies that we are going to have to move beyond those self-imposed limits. To manifest a reality where we are living our passions we have to become a vibrational match to that vision, and this means we must learn to be comfortable being uncomfortable.

Everything starts with one small step. It’s the 1 degree course correction I’ve spoken about before (read blog post here) that ensures you transform your life in a big way!

Momentum is the resulting magnifying element that comes from keeping your eye on the ball, your vision clear and your fire going. Momentum is the force that is behind those times when your life picks up speed and in a seemingly magical way, everything you’ve been working for comes alive all at the same time.

Momentum is the energy that propels you forward as you propel forward yourself and it is a fundamental piece in the journey of transformation. Momentum carries information, it’s telling you that you are being consistent and are staying on-course.

Momentum is the result of moving to gain clarity. We cannot know the whole journey from a static point, we must take one step in order to know where we must go next.

Momentum is important because it is the a force that is created through your own strength, the one you showed by becoming clear on what you desire, by fueling your passion understanding your motivation and taking one small step after another in an inspired way.

Are you building momentum today to ensure you co-create your purposeful life?

Love and light,


Valerie Shakti Bottazzi
Life Coach & Healer

“Almost any decision is better than no decision — just keep moving.” [Danielle LaPorte]

Why gratitude?

Why is everyone so gung-ho about gratitude? Why is it so difficult to connect with the emotions of gratitude some times?

A few years back I went through a phase where I was waking up with anxiety attacks daily. I was very good at using meditation and energy healing techniques to do what is known as a “spiritual bypass” and overcome this state.

The problem with utilizing techniques to overcome the anxiety attack is that I was leaving the core issue unattended. The underlying trauma that was getting me a panic attack was kept alive and kicking, so every day I had to overcome the same anxiety building up during the night.

At that time a friend of mine was giving me the advice to use gratitude as a door to open up to love and get over the morning anxiety. When she was talking to me about gratitude I could not relate to what she was saying. Intellectually I understood her words but I couldn’t connect emotionally with what she was saying. This inability to relate at an emotional level to gratitude sent me further into a downward spiral of anxiety and fear.

As I deepened my studies working with energy I learned that you cannot leap from the lowest vibration of fear and anxiety straight into gratitude and appreciation which are opposite ends of the emotional vibrational scale. I learned that I had to work my way out from fear and anxiety in incremental steps.

From where I stood emotionally I could connect and envision myself feeling better, more at peace and evenly keeled emotionally in my daily life. It was a matter of doing it in baby steps.

There is something known as the scale of emotional frequency (Ref. David R. Hawkins in his “The Map of Consciousness Explained – see image) that shows the lower vibration emotions being shame and guilt, and as you move upwards you find grief, fear and anger. The pivotal point on the scale is with the emotion of courage.

From the moment you feel courageous your vibration rises as you lean into fear and start believing there is hope for you.

The highest vibration emotions on the scale rise as we shift from courage to love, to gratitude all the way to God Consciousness.

I did my healing moving up on the scale one step at a time. I worked my way from panic attacks daily to anxiety feelings sparingly to feeling good and at ease. When I leveled up I started waking up in the mornings feeling good and clear headed. Only then I was able to lean into fear tapping into my courage, creating a new vision of what was possible for me, believing in it, and YES, I was then able to connect emotionally with love and gratitude.

We have been given the ability to create our world in harmony with the Divine. I urge you to use your God-given gift… and, of course, feel gratitude for it. That is why I work with men and women so they can say YES to their spiritual gifts. I want YOU to prosper and live your own version of a magical and meaningful life.

Let’s shine bright together!

Love and light,


Valerie Shakti Bottazzi
Life Coach & Healer


“I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought, and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.” [Gilbert C. Chesterton]